It’s Friday and we need a good laugh!
Share your favorite jokes with us below!
Here’s one of our favorites!
What’s a pirates favorite letter?
You may think it’s R (arrr) but it’s actually the C (sea)!
Now it’s your turn to share a joke! Add your favorites to the comments section below!
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why did the dog jump in the water?cause he did not want to be a hot dog!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I like to laugh but jokes aren’t my thing. :s
This is more of a riddle than a joke, but it’s pretty cool:
You’re in a room with no windows,no doors, and no chimney. The only things inside the room are a mirror, a table and yourself.How do you get out?
Answer: You look in the mirror,you see what you saw. Take the saw and cut the table in half. Two halves make one whole. Go through the hole, and you escaped!!
Hope you liked it!! Reply if you figured it out correctly!!!
what did the polar bear say to the seal?It was ice knowing u!!!!!!!!!!!!11:p
I mustash,what is that?HA HA HA-that wasn’t funny.
Why did the chicken cross the play ground?
to get to the other slide!
HA HA HA!!!!!!
What did the dog say to the tree? Bark
It said bark because trees have bark on them.
knock knock who there owl owl who owl my friends are awesome
LOL good one
Hey loved that lizard7373. I have done at least half of those and i was just like lol. <3
BTW my sis has chickens so when she read the….
Why did the chicken cross the road
because chickens are stupid.
I wish i got a picture she looked offended and i was just like busting a gut
thanks!
Steve goes into a car dealership.
Steve: I need a car.
Man: We have plenty. What kind would you like?
Steve: A car with s’s painted all over it.
Man: Why?
Steve: Because I want people to say “Hey, look at that scargo! (PS escargot is a french dish they eat SNAILS)
This isn’t a joke, but I find it funny.
When life gives you lemons, make grape juice and drink it like a boss. Life will be all like, “Whaaaaaaaaaa???”
A little boy was in school and he was talking about God.
Teacher: Mark? Go outside and look at the sky.
The boy did as she asked and when he came back, the teacher asked him, “Did you see God?”
Mark: No
Teacher: You did not see him, so, therefore, he is not there.
The next thing Mark knew was that there was a little girl. She asked him to look at the teacher.
(this would sooo be me) Little Girl: Can you see the Teacher’s brain?
Mark: -getting rather tired of questions- No
Little Girl: Then, by what we were taught today, she must not have one!
That’s a good one.
That little girl is so me
wow that is SOOO funny!!!
So I saw this on Ruff Ruff Man:
When life gives you lemons throw them at a cat!!!
If your a cat lover sorry but thats funny
why did the chicken cross the road
because chickens are really stupid
hahahahaha
LOVE LAIM 1D ZAYN TOO
Ok so have any of you ever been tricked by a relitive or friend saying “Hey look, there is Mr.Gullible” Reply if you have
Ok, so you said to reply if you have ever done any of those things to reply. I have done all of those things
knock knock who is there banana who knock knock who is there banana who knock knock who is there aren’t you glad i did not say banana
Hi . Just wanted to say I’m kind of
shy of u guys —er—girls.
What has four legs but only one foot?
Answer: a bed
ARTFREAK, THAT WAS A HILARIOUS JOKE YOU DID ON THE POSTAL THINGY. DID U ANSWER MY JOKE FOR YOU: WHY DID THE SCARECROW SCREAM LIKE A LADY WHEN HE SAW HIS REFLECTION?
knock knock. Who’s there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting co…MOO!
I HAVE A JOKE, TOO! BUT THIS JOKE IS FOR FP DANIELLE AND FP KATHERINE. WHAT DOESN’T MOVE AT ALL, BUT FLIES AROUND ALL DAY? HMMMM…..
Hmmmm, I’m not sure, peacepower! What is it??
LOL these are all very good jokes!
whats the only top that has a bottom?
answer: Your legs
So this guy he went to the doctor and the doctor asked him what’s wrong and he said “the first night I went to bed I dreamed I was camping in a tent the second night I went to bed I dreamed I was in a tent in my backyard the third night I went to bed I dreamed I was in a tent again” then the doctor said”I know what’s wrong with you you’re intents
That is hilarious.
So there’s this guy his name is arty so he went into a hotel and choked the check in guy then he went upstairs and choked the maid then someone called the police he choke the police so the headline of the news paper was Arty Choke 3 For One Dollar.
If you don’t get it here’s why it’s funny:
Artichoke is a vegetable so it sounds like Artichoke 3 for one dollar
bff 1)pete and repete were on a boat pete fell off, who was left?
bff 2) repete
bff 1)pete and repete were on a boat pete fell off, who was left?
bff 2) repete
bff 1)pete and repete were on a boat pete fell off, who was left?
bff 2) I GIVE UP!
bff1) repete
bff2) I SAID I GIVE UP!!!
BFF1) no the answer is repete
my mom did that to me and it lasted forever!! i was like 4 or 5 then too, im 11 now soon to be 12 on groundhogs day.
Me and my mom always do that omg!!!!!!!!
Oh my gosh, my dads friend did that to me…… I was so confused at first and then I got it. I finally was just like, THE SECOND GUY!
i got mad at my mom and i finally quit after 30min and she had to explain it to me!!
_
“What runs but can’t walk?”
“What?”
“A nose!”
Here is a really hard riddle my teacher told my class.
Molly likes Kelly but doesn’t like Mary, Molly likes hills but doesn’t like mountains, Molly likes books but doesn’t likes reading. Can you tell me some other things Molly likes?
I know! Jelly, cookies, tootsie rolls…….all words with double letters……
The answer to your riddle is that Molly likes double letters
i have not 8-P
1) school:2+2=4
homework:2+4+2=8
exam:Omar has 4 apples his train is 7 min early, calculate the mass of the sun.
**********************************************
2) the trick is to not let people know how weird you really are until its too late for them to back out
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
3) trying to fall asleep is as hard as try trying to wake up
#############################
4) *mom yells your name*
you:yeees??! *silence
you:ugh! *gets up and see what she wants*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
5) that mini heart attack u get when ur foot misses a single stair
“““““““““““““““““““““““““““““
6) when you meet me you think im quiet once you get to know me you wish i were quiet
”””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””
7) if luaghter is the best medicine then how come people can die laughing?
“”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”
8) reply if youve ever done one of these.
1 walked into a room, forot what you were getting, walked out then remembered
2 when you were younger, drew the sun in the corner of the paper
3when you were littl thought the real shape of a heart was <3
4 closed the fridge door really slow just to see when the lights went off/on.
5 tried to balance the light between the on and off switch.
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9)i hate it when people see me at the super market and they're like "hey what are you doing here?" and im just like "oh you know, just hunting for elephants."
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
10) 3 most difficult thing to do in the world
1 you cant count ur hair
2 you cant wash ur eyes with soap
3 you cant breathe from ur mouth when ur biting ur tongue.
now please put ur tongue back in ur mouth
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hope you like them!! which is ur fave, 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 or 10?
heres another on
11) if April showers bring Mays flowers, then what do may flowers bring? pilgrims!
Haha, I have seen all those on pictures, but they still ake me laugh!!!
so for 8 I say yes to:
1, 2, 4, 5.
the real shape of a heat isnt <3
I’ve done EVERYTHING in #8!!!!!!!!!!!!!
same here! on num 10 i was like true, true, then on the 3rd impossible thing i stuck out my tongue, and then i read all of it and it made me feel so predictable… it made me really lol
My fave is #8!!!! It’s super funny!
How do you post a candle to the wall with thumbtacks, toothpicks,and a tray with out letting the wax drop on the ground
i dont know…how?
Go on Pinterest? Facebook? I dunno…
what is black and white and red all over ?
a newspaper
Okay I saw this on face …….. *teacher says to students* okay whoever answers my next question can go home”. *student throws paper airplane at teacher* *teacher says*
Who threw that airplane? *student says me… Now can I home?”
LOL HAHAHA HEHEHE HOHOHO …sooo funny!!!!!!!
: P 
that is so funny. I can see someone doing that.
why couldnt the gun get a job?
it always got FIRED!!
boy:hey dad how much i am worth to you and mom dad:to us your priceless boy:how about a thousand dad:no more like a billion boy:that’s great how about lending me twentey of it
Here’s one that I came up with this morning:
How do you stop an astronaut from panicking?
You comet.
Okay, here’s a riddle:
There are 500 bricks in a plane. One falls out. How many are left in the plane?
ANSWER:499
What are the three steps to putting a deer in the fridge?
1. open the fridge.
2. put the deer in
3.close the fridge
What are the steps to putting an elephant in the fridge?
1.open the fridge
2.take the deer out
3.put the elephant in
4. close the fridge
The lion king has a birthday party, every animal but one shows up. Who doesn’t?
The elephant.
gtg, tell you the rest later!
OMG! That is soooo funny!
YOU GUYS ARE DOOMED. With free ice cream
what did one ocean say to the other? nothing they just waved! you sea what i did there!
Haha LOL! I sea what you did there!
How do u make fruit punch ???
Give it boxxing lessons!!!!:)
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Why was Rita carrying a ladder to school??:)
She was going to high school!!!!
______________________________________
Coolio Joke!!
Whaaaaaaaaaat!!!!
Q: Why did the kid throw the clock out the window?
A: He wanted to see time fly!
This one isn’t really a joke, but it’s funny! (I remembered this one from piterest)
An elderly husband and wife visit their doctor when they begin forgetting little things. Their doctor tells them that many people find it useful to write themselves little notes.
When they get home, the wife says, “Dear, will you please go to the kitchen and get me a dish of ice cream? And maybe write that down so you won’t forget?”
“Nonsense,” says the husband, “I can remember a dish of ice cream.”
“Well,” says the wife, “I’d also like some strawberries and whipped cream on it.”
“My memory’s not all that bad,” says the husband. “No problem — a dish of ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream. I don’t need to write it down.”
He goes into the kitchen; his wife hears pots and pans banging around. The husband finally emerges from the kitchen and presents his wife with a plate of bacon and eggs.
She looks at the plate and asks, “Hey, where’s the toast I asked for?”
I mean pinterest!
not piterest!
Lol!!! Thats funny
lol
that is really funny hay people please talk to me!
Here is a joke:
A woman gets onto a train pushing a stroller. A man looks at her really funny. “You should put a bag on that baby’s head. It’s ugly.”
The woman is really offended and finds the cudoctor and says, “That man has insulted me.”
“I’m sorry, that’s unnaceptable behavior on a train. Also, would you like a banana for your monkey?”
If you don’t get it the joke is the baby really was ugly because he thought the baby was a monkey. XD LOL
-Kayla
ive saw other versions of this, its so funny
Ok. 1. A farmer sees a a giraffe on the floor and says ” hey wuts that lyin there?” And another guy says” thats not a lion thats a giraffe.” 2. When life gives u lemons, throw them back and ask for chocolate.
I don’t get the first one….the second one is funny though!
Lyin and lion sound the same so the guy got confused. Lyin=lying but the farmer has an accent.
artfreak1213 -
In the first one, the farmer says, “Hey wuts that lyin there?” and instead of saying lyinG, he just says lyin’ because of his accent. And lyin’ rhymes with lion, so the other guy probably thinks he means lion. Now do you get it?
-CookieGirl
Oh, and -
talk about stereotypes!
-CookieGirl
I get it now, thanks!
Boy:would you be made at me for something I didn’t do?
Teacher: no, of course not!
Boy: great, because I didn’t do my homework!!
Teacher: …………
LOL!
Let me finish the sentence.
YOU GET A LATE SLIP! NO PIZZA FOR YOU! NOW I’M MAD!
OMG!
))))
SOOOOOOOOOOOOO funny!
<3 it! so funny! LOL!
-CookieGirl
That is a good one.
-yellowhair
lol good one